Why Your New Year’s Resolutions Keep Failing — and How Identity-Based Resolutions Can Actually Work

Identity-Based Resolutions Start With How You Work, Not Just What You Want

As the year winds down, many of us start setting resolutions for the next one.

This is the year I’ll…

• Lose weight

• Get organized

• Be more present with my family

• Read more

• Sleep more

• Stress less

• Finally start that hobby I’ve been putting off

These are good goals. Important goals.

But here’s something most people never say out loud:

It’s almost impossible to be more present, more creative, more rested, or more connected when work takes up every corner of your brain.

If you’re constantly:

• Checking email at night

• Reacting to every message the second it arrives

• Sitting in meetings you don’t need to be in

• Rushing through your day in a low-level state of urgency

…it doesn’t matter how many resolutions you set.

Your mind has no space left for anything else.

That’s why so many resolutions fall apart by mid-January — not because you lack discipline, but because you’re trying to change the outcome without changing the identity and habits that support it.

The Real Reason New Year’s Resolutions Fall Apart

Most resolutions focus on outcomes:

• “I’ll work out more.”

• “I’ll be less stressed.”

• “I’ll stop checking email at night.”

• “I’ll slow down.”

But outcomes don’t drive behavior.

Identity does.

As James Clear writes in Atomic Habits:

“Every action is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

That idea changed everything for me.

The Question That Turned My Resolutions Into Identity-Based Change

In 2025, I didn’t set a long list of resolutions. I didn’t pick a theme. I didn’t create a 12-goal plan.

I chose one question:

“Does this serve me?”

Not in a selfish way — in a clarifying one.

• Does this task serve me?

• Does this client serve me?

• Does this way of working serve me?

• Does this habit serve me?

• Does this relationship serve me?

• Does this purchase serve me?

When I started answering honestly, everything shifted:

• My work improved

• My stress dropped

• My creativity exploded

• My evenings came back

This wasn’t about doing less. It was about becoming a different version of myself — the one I said I wanted to be.

And that made something clear:

If you want your personal resolutions to succeed, your work style has to change too.

Why Identity-Based Resolutions Work Better Than Traditional Goals

Instead of asking:

• How do I lose weight?

• How do I stress less?

• How do I get organized?

• How do I be more present?

Try asking:

“Who is the version of me who naturally achieves these things — and how does that person work?”

Because the calmer, healthier, more present version of you:

• Doesn’t check email at 10 p.m.

• Takes real lunch breaks

• Says no to low-value meetings

• Stops multitasking

• Protects time for deep thinking

• Leaves space for hobbies, family, and life

That version of you succeeds outside of work because of what changes inside of work.

A Gentle Nudge Toward Identity-Based Resolutions in 2026

You don’t need to overhaul everything next year. You don’t need dozens of new habits.

You just need consistent votes for your future identity:

• Finish one task before responding to another

• Protect one hour of deep thinking

• Take one walk without your phone

• Say no once when something doesn’t serve you

• Remove yourself from one meeting you don’t need

• Rest without guilt

These are identity-based resolutions in action.

A calmer identity. A clearer identity. A more intentional one.

Here's to a clearer, calmer 2026!